No relation to Don Diego De La Vega, the Spanish fop who masqueraded as the legendary Zorro, Rossana De La Vega, whose ass belongs among the seven wonders of the modern world, has acquired habits no self-respecting fop would consider. Chiefly among them, smoking. But not to fault her entirely, Rossana picked up the habit from a Russian émigré named Swarovski whom she was madly in love with at the time. They have since experienced the parting of the ways due to deportation [Swarovski's], but Rossana cannot get the smell of Swarovski off her. And to nurture the memory, she continues to puff away and expose her feet to political madmen. Some women take finality very hard, and we can only hope the serotonin dosages will stabilize Rossana's condition.